METAPHOR
When Dr. Rosenberger introduced me to Al Vernacchio through a required assignment, I thought he was going to be another talking head who aligned his theories with the logic that sexuality encompasses sensuality, intimacy, identity, sexual health, and sexualization.
Boy, was I wrong.
Sex educator Al Vernacchio conceptualized that conversations create a strong linkage between baseball and sexual activity. He quite rightfully illustrated that one could be a pitcher or a catcher – whether you perform or receive a sexual act – of course, the bases, which ultimately result in scoring a run or scoring out.
A home run results in vaginal intercourse to the point of orgasm for at least the guy.
Vernacchio rightfully places baseball as an outdated metaphor that strongly connects to competition, winning, and losing. This connection is completely problematic and cannot result in healthy sexuality for young people. Without meaningful change, sexual activities will still be regarded as competitive. Furthermore, the metaphors create an environment where one party or the other ultimately loses. It’s a competitive environment – not playing with but against the other. Take your position and play the game.
Let's Change the Metaphor Used to Reference Sex to Pizza
Pizza serves as a better metaphor. The desire to eat pizza starts from an internal desire. Something that one wants and that one has a sense of control over. When we get together with someone for pizza, we seek a satisfying experience for both people. You negotiate what you like, and you experience a negotiated outcome.
Figuring out what we like about pizza is about discovering our desires and what we find that will lead to a satisfying experience.
This perspective offers a unique starting point for a new conversation around sex and health. The perspective, when overlaid with sex education, can produce a noncompetitive environment (unlike baseball), and more like pizza, we can educate individuals to make individual decisions that promote joint decision-making and open communication and discussion.
It’s not a sport to be won or lost. It doesn’t have to be viewed as this gushy, love-centric act. Like pizza, one can make individual decisions regarding sex and not be subject to the rules of some game—bottom line. Pizza is lateral to sex, whereas baseball is a sport made to win or lose.
We, through the pizza model, can encourage students to ask questions and explore healthy, satisfying sexual activity through a new approach to comprehensive sexuality education.